I spent my whole childhood always admiring but never truly motivated by the amazing people I met or heard about in the world. I always thought it was weird to not have anyone that I could look at and say, "I wanna do all the things they do!" and it got even stranger when I moved to NYC. All the kids at my school had their idols who gave them something to aspire to. Mind you I went to a theater school so most of those idols were Madonna, Cher, Beyonce, Britney, and Madonna. Yes I know I wrote Madonna twice and I meant it! Worse than everyone else having very clear and specific aspirations, whenever a teacher gave us advice on staying motivated and making our mark they would always say "Look at your own role models in this industry, find out what they did, then do it."
Now I am grateful to have spent my life without idolizing a person so much that I never think for myself or live my own life. But thats not what a role model is to most sane people. See to the kids I went to school with or the successful people I meet role models give you that extra push to do what you feel you were meant to do. They show us it can be done and they blaze a path to get us just far enough down the road to blaze our own. Well in my adult life I found that in someone. That person is Jason Mraz! I know you are not all that surprised at this being that I put his name in the title but it was a shock to me. I grew up in an all black neighborhood on the south side of Chicago. My family celebrated Kwaanza and sent my cousins and I to African American Summer Learning Camp where we learned African and African American history as well as african dance and swahili. We also had to call our camp counselors by the titles Baba (for male elders) and Mama (for female elders). I have been reading Lorraine Hansberry and Maya Angelou since I was 7 years old, and where do I find my deepest inspiration in art and activism? A white guy with a guitar. So wrong yet so right.
I have listened to Jason Mraz for years but in the last few I started paying closer attention to who he is as an artist and I like it. No, I love it! He is a clever lyricist, who blends all the styles he loves into his own unique style, including rap which I would not recommend to most white guys who are not Eminem. Yet he boldly creates his own flow and always promotes love and his music is soul affirming and funny at the same time. He also is involved in some amazing eco-projects including but not limited to a fair trade/ organic t-shirt company and his own solar powered avocado farm. He is a human rights activist and more than all that he talks about his failures just as much as his victories. Posting pictures of himself falling of stage, blogging about his failures as a friend, his break ups and make ups and more. Now that is the end of the official Jason Mraz commercial.
One night I had a dream (no not that kind of dream) that I was sitting in a seat thinking horrible thought about my life and art. Sitting right behind me was Jason Mraz. Everytime I had myself convinced I was worthless and could never reach my dreams, he would whisper that I could all the loving thought that I know to be true but never say out loud he said them to me until his voice became my own. This was not some romantic dream as a matter of fact I am not attracted to Mr. Mraz in that way at all (no offense Jason) in my dream he just felt like a friend I could trust to tell the truth. I felt like Pinnoccio spouting lies about myself and Jason was my Jiminey Crickett, trying his best to keep me out of trouble. Since it was my dream it WAS my voice speaking loving thoughts. And that is the point of me writing this semi stalker-ish blog. It is not about Jason Mraz. It is bigger than him. It is bigger than any role model anywhere. Marianne Williamson wrote, "And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." That is Jason Mraz has done for me.
By simply being who he is he has somehow given me permission to be who I am. I never realized that though I loved being unique in my personal life I had begun to see it as a liability in my career and an entertainer. Who would sign a soul/pop/folk singing black girl. Who would put the 5'9" giant girl with a fro on Broadway. What vegan animal activist teaches sunday school? My voice is not big enough for a black girl. My notes don't go as high as most of the great singers I know of. But I have something to give as an artist and performer. Now more than ever I believe I can do it! I can't explain it fully but maybe I am not meant to. I wrote in my last post about the dream being bigger than us. About our responsibility to keep pursuing it. I meant every word. So my thanks to Jason, and every person who determines to live & love in their unique and special way. You truly are our role models liberating those of us in the shackles of fear and doubt.
P.S. For my birthday I stood in line at Carnagie Hall and spent my birthday money on 5th row tickets to what will be my first Jason Mraz concert. "How did you get to Carnagie Hall?" one might ask. Well the answer is "Practice, practice, practice!" (Sorry I couldn't resist!)
God Bless and Namaste Y'all!
